Exhausted

I bent myself into understanding
until I forgot what I needed.
You called it “going with the flow.”
I called it swallowing my fears.
You said you cared.
But caring without choosing
is just comfort.
I stood beside you
while you explored freedom,
strength, independence
and I respected it.
But who respected me?
I asked for reassurance
and felt guilty for it.
I slowed down
so I wouldn’t lose you.
And somehow
I still ended up
second.
I am exhausted
from being the emotionally responsible one.
From loving carefully.
From loving deeply.
From loving alone.
You didn’t break me.
You just showed me
what it feels like
to never be someone’s priority.
And that
hurts differently.